Dear Soonerguys,
Why do the Sooner mascots Boomer and Sooner have hands? This has bugged me for a long time. Horses with hands are creepy. They’re horses. You could ask a kindergartner and I think they would be pretty sure horses don’t have hands. Don’t horses have hooves? Horseshoes wouldn’t fit properly on a horse with hands. And horses with hands are creepy.
I don’t think horses make very good mascots to begin with. Horses are intimidating. Horses have large teeth.
They remind me of a relative I had as a kid. She was the kind of relative that pinches your cheeks and buys you gifts from garage sales. She had penciled on eyebrows that made her look like she was always surprised to see you and a deep raspy voice because she was a chain smoker.
I don’t think this a very good message to send to our young Sooner fans out there, do you?
I miss Top Daug. He was a good, wholesome mascot who obviously didn’t smoke. How else could he have made those amazing basketball shots? And he follows in the tradition of an even older canine mascot: Mex.
I think we should bring Mex back as the OU mascot. I realize he’s been dead for almost 90 years but he would still be a great inspiration to Sooner fans everywhere propped up on the sidelines just like the good old days.
Modern day taxidermists can do amazing things. I once saw a stuffed squirrel with a cowboy hat and a cigarette in his mouth.
I don’t think a squirrel would make a very good mascot.
Please consider starting a petition to replace our current creepy handed horses with Mex the Dog. I would be glad to sign it as many times as needed.
Sincerely
Tim
A Concerned Sooner Citizen
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